It by Stephen King

half a dragon aka a baby dragon

I actually feel bad giving this a baby dragon (aka half a star) not because I think it deserves more, but rather because I fear what King would do with a baby dragon or baby anything.

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Let me start by saying I didn’t like It. I DNF’ed at 313 pages. I know I know. Throw tomatoes at me or better yet throw big red clown noses.

It’s stupidly long for no real reason with a million meaningless tangents. Even when I ignore the writing the storyline really isn’t that good. I came for horror and got dancing clowns and old movies that weren’t even scary back then.

It’s not Stephen King at his best it is Stephen King at his typical “I don’t know how to end a chapter so let’s just see where the next fifty pages take us.” The answer: nowhere. So I didn’t really see the point in banging my head against a wall for the next 900 or so pages. This book reads like King decided to cash in on the scary clown idea without doing anything besides putting a clown in a few times every fifty pages. I believe he thought he could stir in a clown, bullies, a small town, and 445,000 words and it would automatically be terrifying. In a way he was right, I was in fact terrified of the volume of this book, but little else.

Also, I would like to take this time to reassert that King is creepy not because he writes horror but because of his insistence that borderline-rape-sex or straight up rape belongs in all books and that this book specifically needed a child orgy. You know just for kicks.

If you think that the child orgy is normal or acceptable in any way then you need to see a shrink fast. And make sure you don’t drive by any elementary schools or playgrounds on the way. If it had been a trick by It to make this happen then I would have been horrified but accepted that it was a horror story. I still wouldn’t have liked it and would have still thought King was a creep, but trying to play it off as normal child bonding is just too much for any sane person.

It had continuous unnecessary scenes. I don’t need to know everything that a character did in the last twenty plus years that led to horror of horrors a “normal life.” I don’t need to hear every one of Richard’s voices. And I don’t need to hear the details of how Bill became a famous writer and spurned his professor (yes, King we get it you’re a self-made writer who had no help whatsoever from a professor and probably not from an editor either).

There is zero explanation of why It doesn’t kill them when it has the chance. In the movie they explain most of the scenes by the kids getting away somehow, but in the book the clown/demon just disappears randomly. It toys with just these kids while all the others it kills quickly. Why is that?

I’m here to tell you that if you think you have to read Stephen King’s It because it’s a huge literary triumph then you are wrong. If you want to tackle a huge book with amazing writing that still has some tangents read Les Miserables.

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